Something that has really been weighing on my heart the past few weeks is that of sufficiency – what does a life need in order to be full, to have everything it needs?
The obvious, "Christian" answer ("just love Jesus, He'll give you everything you need") always seemed rather trite – I knew it to be true, but I always found it difficult to act that truth out in my life.
Something that I really found during my trip away was that God was showing me that He was enough, that all the things I wanted to retain control over had to be handed over.
The problem (?) is, there's once you pass that point, truly hand control over, there's no going back. You're committed to finding joy in everything that the Lord shows you and takes you through, even if it doesn't fit with the plans you've supposedly laid down.
The biggest struggle, then, is to keep from second-guessing. It really reminds me of the Israelites – they'd seen God's amazing hand in delivering them from slavery in Egypt. They'd seen plagues, miracles, and signs worthy of being passed down through the generations as examples of God's power and faithfulness – but as soon as things got a little hard? They wanted their "control" back, to feel like they were in charge. They needed constant reminders (and more than a little discipline) to remind them of Who they depended on for their very existence.
My prayer is to be able to echo these words of Chris Tomlin:
All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough
You are my supply
My breath of life
And still more awesome than I know
You are my reward
worth living for
And still more awesome than I know
All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough
You're my sacrifice
Of greatest price
And still more awesome than I know
You're the coming King
You are everything
And still more awesome than I know
More than all I want
More than all I need
You are more than enough for me
More than all I know
More than all I can say
You are more than enough for me
Image: 96dpi on flickr
This reminds me of how I felt going back to Uni to study law after living in Africa. The value systems here clashed with the way that I had learned to live. I struggled with the contradictions for a few years. Thankfully, as you said about the Israelites, God keeps reminding us of what we once knew. Truth can get buried in a grave...but it won't stay there.
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